PNW Haunts & Homicides

St. Patrick's Day Goes Dark

March 14, 2023 Episode 101
PNW Haunts & Homicides
St. Patrick's Day Goes Dark
PNW Haunts & Homicides +
Get a shoutout in an upcoming episode!
Starting at $3/month
Show Notes Transcript

Though he’s the main topic of conversation in today’s episode, Luke Matthew Short may not be exactly who you’re likely to picture when you think about the mischievous, diminutive fairies of classic Irish folklore known as leprechauns.  

Each year on St. Patrick’s Day ☘️ you have a choice to make. Whether you brave the rowdy, green booze soaked crowds and lose hours of your life in a chartreuse haze (because after all, you only YOLO once) or you simply avoid the hassle with a quiet night in, because to you, adulting means never having to worry about FOMO ever again, heed the warning against all manner of bad behavior on the occasion because even the Luck of the Irish eventually runs out.  

Check out the Sugar Coated Murder Podcast!

In addition to the Patreon, remember you can support the show via Apple Podcast Subscription, and drum roll please - our new Buzzsprout Subscription Feature for a shoutout in a future episode!

If you're enjoying our podcast, please consider leaving a rating & review on Apple Podcasts.  It helps get us seen by more creepy people just like you!  Find us on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, Patreon,  & more!  If you have any true crime, paranormal, or witchy stories you'd like to share with us & possibly have them read (out loud) on an episode, email us at or use this link.  Another great way to support the show is by making a one time donation through BuyMeACoffee.

AD Music from Uppbeat License YWG9BPO0I7XYQBBQ. Cover art by The Three Cs.

Pastebin: for sources

Support the show

But again, in news we actually care about, according to digital third coast, there was a three point nine percent spike in crime. Over the holiday weekend in the city of Portland. No. No. And we're not the only ones. Actually, of the cities that they looked at were only number thirteen, which of course I don't care for, but Here we are. Hi, Cassie. Hi, Caitlyn. Hi, creepy people. Hello. Hello. Happy Saint Patrick's Day. What was it Saint Patrick's Day? Not as we're recording this, but very soon. Is that why I'm wearing green too? You're wearing some green. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. We got cute green socks that someone pick out. They're so cute. Green stripes, and they have a shamrock. Hell yeah or Clover. Shamrock because it's the Shamrock Shamrock's. Shamrock's. Wow. But wait, there's more. Exactly. This is P and W, Hanson Homesites. Yeah. Saint Patrick's Day goes dark in addition. Oh. Are we doing a haunt or a home aside today? Not really either. I'm gonna leave that whole thing in. I'm keeping the mystery alive. Okay? I am dying to find out she's been teasing me with this. Alright. I'm gonna get into it. On Saint Patty's Day, according to an article by Vice dated three fourteen of twenty fourteen, less than a handful of days prior to the holiday that year. Eighty percent of all drunk driving deaths involve drivers who are nearly twice the legal limit. Ew, Yeah. That's real drunk. It's pretty drunk. I'd be falling. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Now, drunk driving and related fatalities increase on many other holidays. I think this stunning statistic dramatically illustrating the level of intoxication on this particular holiday has left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth. Just, you know, for me personally -- Yeah. -- feels a little oookey. The annual hundred and sixty billion dollar hit that companies take in worker productivity due to absenteeism and hangovers To be honest, I don't really give a shit about that. You should just get the day off after every single holiday. Yeah. I know how to solve it. Yeah. I fixed it. Fix the problem. There you go. But again, in news we actually care about, according to digital third coast, there was a three point nine percent spike in crime over the holiday weekend in the city of Portland. No. No. And we're not the only ones. Actually of the cities that they looked at were only number thirteen, which of course I don't care for. But here we are.

Before I get to some other crazy stories, Cassie, guess the number one city. If you correctly guess it, we'll have to pick some lotto numbers next. It's not Portland because you already said. Is it? It's P and W? No. Okay. Okay. For reference, Seattle is at number ten. Okay. I was gonna guess Seattle because I was thinking BMW.

So anywhere in the world, what's the number one city? In the states. Oh, right. Yeah. That's what I meant. Where crime goes up on Saint Patrick's Day. Mhmm. It's gotta be somewhere on the East Coast. Well, I think. Well, I'm gonna guess New York. I don't know. Okay. I mean, that's not a biased guess. It's actually Savannah, Georgia. Oh, okay. That's very weird. Yeah. You would never guess that in a million years. Yeah. I lived real close to there. Yeah.

Which has a relatively small population compared to others on the list at approximately a hundred and fifty thousand at the time of the data being recorded. Just a few short years ago. The reason they see such an intense spike is apparently due to the influx of nearly as many people from outside the city for the annual Saint Patrick's Day parade. So the population of the city doubles in size. Wow. I had no idea they even had, like, a big parade there. Not what I would have thought of. Yeah. No. Not at all. Meanwhile, in Hoboken, New Jersey, they hadn't hosted Saint Patrick's Day Parade since two thousand eleven.

Following that banner year for crime and anarchy, in the city where thirty four people were arrested and a hundred and thirty six were taken to seek medical attention in ambulatory vehicles. Oh, no. During a Saint Patrick's day parade? Yep. But why? Luck of the Irish. Oh. Yeah. What's the episode? Yeah. Exactly. But in Dayton, Ohio where the annual party was rated the craziest in the country, by the most scholarly of sources, bro bible dot com. Bro bible dot com. Police responded by arriving in riot gear. Oh my gosh. So all over the country, we have cities and college campus parties canceled because of violent conflicts and assaults. Notably, Some college campuses have put a kibosh on the whole celebration because the instance of sexual assault. Oh, see such a huge spike.

I hate all of this. Like, it's supposed to be a fun time, fun holiday. You fools. I can make anything dark.

And then there's Luke Matthew Short. Who like it or not is now inextricably linked to the whole mess. Is he a leprechaun? Oh. Oh. Most last name was short. Yeah. It's not even the thing that gonna make you laugh in the end. Oh god. Yeah. Or, well, he's about to be. Because his choice of ink made him briefly infamous when one particular police department decided to get creative, Cheers to them. I don't know what you're talking about. I know. You're gonna find that. So I'm itching Luke Matthew Short was born December twenty eighth of nineteen eighty six.

That's about all the background we have time for, but I digress. I know this man, not personally. I was gonna say what? But the archetype, if you will. He's the human embodiment of all manner of destruction. Okay.

So you can form your opinions now. They should be some variation of don't like him. Zero out of ten. Think I got it. I would not recommend. Though it should be noted that traffic violations are hardly something that I would typically lose sleep over. But you see, I have very little patience for the particular pattern of buffoonery that he seems to enjoy. Buffoonery. It's like a merry go round except no one is merry and I'm wondering why everyone is still spinning around its circles. They don't. I mean Even the justice system? Probably. Mhmm. Yeah. See only logical.

So we'll start at the beginning. Well, sort of. It's the beginning of his criminal record, at least in one jurisdiction. But let me preface by saying it seems like he's already on parole at this point. Oh, okay. So not really the start. No. There's the last ten years of criminal history in more than one state and it is a lot to cover and unpack. So here goes.

In August of twenty thirteen, he was charged with presenting a false name or information to a law enforcement officer in the state of Ohio. When he was questioned after being stopped on the street, he gave his first name as Shawn, reporting the correct last name as Short, which seems dumb because I feel like one of the things that happens in most stops is that your identity will be verified, but okay. Bold strategy cotton. Let's see if it pays off for him. He stated he was simply fearful given his parole status. Pretty sure this is included in the fine print of what not to do when you're on parole. Right. I mean, we all need the people to show us what not to do. Yeah. Barely a month later, Sean, I mean, Luke, Sorry. That was cheap, but either way, he was back on his bullshit. And listen, until it becomes violent and causes harm to someone else, Luke, just like anyone else, and their criminal history isn't on my radar. Not my circus, not my fucking monkeys.

But it was September nineteenth of that same year that Luke committed, aggravated, burglary. And in this case, He had what Ohio categorizes as a weapon or dangerous ordinance on or about the offender's person or under the offender's control? What does that mean? Really great question. I was like, that's a lot. I don't know what that means. Yeah. He had forced entry into a private residence in Toledo, Ohio with an accomplice. The homeowner interrupted the burglary, which is, of course, to put it technically major pants shitting territory. I thought you don't shit your pants, Caitlin? No. This guy, we'll call him, Bill, confronted both of the would be burglars. Court reports indicate that Luke was apprehended with a firearm in his possession following a pursuit by the police after the incident. So basically, he he had a he had a gun. Okay. Seems like the charge they listed was needlessly wordy, but, you know, it's it's Ohio.

Now, you probably have a lot of questions. Starting with when did you start taking an interest in this type of crime? To which I say, wait for it. Why are we talking about a case in Ohio? Same response. Guys, it's a holiday. So humor me. Will you? I am. Do it. No one's arguing with you. Okay. Cool. In my head, you're all arguing. Never. I promise I'll do my best to ensure that it pays off. Deal? Deal. Okay. Cool. I already had okay. Cool typed into the notes, so this is happening. If it doesn't work, I'm gonna break your pinkies. Those are my cutest fingers.

Now it's possible that Luke managed to stay out of trouble, AKA, other people's homes, and almost straight and narrow. But this next part sort of makes me think that he probably just didn't get caught. Andor was busy with other crimes until November of twenty sixteen. At which point, He starts to edge more into my particular territory or beat. Okay. I don't like it. No one does.

The victim's name in this case has been redacted from court documents, okay, which is almost never a good sign. Yeah. Basically, what I gather from said court records is that he threw a rock through this person's window. Rude. Very rude. Unfortunately, the shattered glass crash landed on a mother and her three year old daughter in the residence resulting in bodily harm to both. Though it's unclear what exactly that entails, And by that, I mean, like, I don't know what their injuries were. Still, it's a pretty horrifying image. Yeah.

This also occurred in Toledo, Ohio. Oh my gosh. I can't imagine having a window break on me? Yeah. You probably have cuts, I'm assuming. I have to imagine. Right? Mhmm. At a minimum. The whole three year old. I mean, it's breaking glass. Right? Like, under the right circumstances, you can end up with some pretty serious lacerations. Yeah. And, I mean, you're a three year old. You get startled. You probably get up and run. Right. That's when I I don't like maybe. I don't like it. I don't like this next part either. Why do I do this? Now, twenty eighteen is where we issue a trigger warning for DV. K. Gonna wait for everybody to tune out before I say domestic violence. Okay. We're still in Toledo, Ohio.

But it's at this point that his live in partner contacts police after he slapped her in the face, causing what was described as minor small to her upper lip. This was at the end of May. He was formally charged with domestic violence in this instance. Just a couple of weeks later, he's charged for driving without a license. It's not until October of twenty eighteen. That my blood really begins to boil as a pattern seems to emerge.

On or about October third, He was involved in another domestic violence incident where he knowingly caused or attempted to cause physical harm to a family or household member. Bro. Same team. If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times. I don't know how sporting works. But I'm pretty sure that you're not supposed to do that. No. You don't tackle your own quarterback? No. Right? I don't think so. Okay. Somebody get Tom Brady on the phone. You can be our next guest -- Yeah. -- to explain football to us. Perfect.

In this case, the victim's name was provided in court proceedings. But since this is our only discussion that involves her and pretty fucking sure she's been through enough already, I'm not sharing it. The victim told law enforcement that Luke was her child's father and her current live in boyfriend. During an argument, he punched her in the right side of her face. Oh, yikes. I just can't imagine reaching over and punching somebody. Right? It's so weird. It's so weird how you should, like, you would just, like, never do that. Yeah. Right? Right? Yeah. It's so weird. Mhmm.

In January of twenty nineteen, he was charged with possession of controlled substance following an incident or two officers responded along with the Toledo fire department where he was treated with NARCAN. Luke did respond to the NARCAN as intended. And admitted to having taken a handful of pills at the scene. What's the NARCAN? NARCAN is what they jab you with when it's apparent that you are incapacitated from an apparent overdose -- Oh, okay. -- of some kind. Right. And stuff that brings you back. Okay. Now, I don't think that criminalizing addiction has worked out all that well for our country. And I'm not going to pretend that I have the answers for how to address all of the drug and addiction related issues in our communities, but Yikes. Yo. Things are not going well. Bill.

He was able to post bond and was released on five thousand dollars bail. He was set to report back to court on January sixteenth at nine AM. Court records do seem to indicate that he not only showed up for that court appearance, but was found guilty because Duh. Duh. Duh. However, when the case was continued to march of twenty nineteen, he failed to appear and a bench warrant was issued. Mhmm. Oh, And the Baylor was, shit out of luck more than likely, because, yeah, remember that five thousand dollar bomb that was posted. Mhmm. Or if he hadn't been arrested just a couple days later, that would have been the case anyway. You're just like, Oops, guess I'm down five k.

Just a week after the bench warrant was issued, the defendant was sentenced to thirty days in the Northwest Ohio Corrections Center, which was really twenty four days suspended as he was given credit for six stays served in the Lucas County Corrections Center. At this time, he was on active probation. In May, the case and associated charges were sent to collections, which I thought meant like actual collections. I think that is just like court collections. Right. So that's kind of a bummer. Less than two weeks later, he was arrest did and booked into the Lucas County Corrections Center. His bond was set at ten thousand dollars this go around. Under an amended charge, he was released on his own recognizance. Measure he's already skipped out on bail.

That makes no sense. You guys, I'm wrong. Burgundy? K? That's a choice, which honestly, look, I don't think I can be compelled to care about this guy being found in possession of less than a gram of heroin, but I'm sort of wondering how it's ever been allowed to happen from the outside of a jail cell after, oh, you know, just the little crimes of burglary, multiple violent crimes against a multitude of victims. I'm not quite ready to say lock him up and throw away the key, but at what point do we decide that harming others is a crime with consequences? You know, like the keep you in custody for the safety of others, types of consequences. I got no answers.

June of twenty eighteen, despite being subpoenaed, the victim in yet another Domestic violence case fails to appear. Often on, over the remainder of the summer of twenty eighteen, whether the victim, and even a witness would appear. It was basically like a game of musical chairs, deciding who would appear in the courtroom. But you know who it presents a real problem when they fail to appear? The motherfucking defendant Yeah. In October, another bench warrant was issued for his arrest. By December of twenty eighteen, the notices that were being issued to the victim were being returned by the post office. I could be wrong, but I don't think it takes a genius to figure out that this person most likely moved away. And shocker did not provide a forwarding address. Weird. Wonder why? Listen, if you keep releasing the guy who is assault people. Those people might not be super interested in showing up to a place where that guy knows they'll be at a predetermined date and time. Right. In the end, by October twenty nineteen, this case and associated charges would also be sent to collections. Awesome.

It was incredibly confusing trying to comb through the list of charges just in this singular county during this ten year span. Like, how do you do so much? How's it doing the most? I don't get it. Between all of the different periods of time that he was jailed, then released, all of the failures to appear, both on his part and that of the complaining witness, continuances, etcetera, etcetera. It was a real mess. And some of the court history for the charges stretched over a period of multiple years. There's so much overlapping.

But now, let's get the hell out of Ohio. All of the memes I mean, I'm gonna be honest, they might have been on to something about that place. I hadn't heard about the Ohio memes and till I started looking into this case. If you haven't heard about it, you're in for a real treat. Just Google, Ohio memes. I have it. Yeah. Just Google it. That's worth it. We're headed for the Oregon Municipal Court. Okay.

Because for some inexplicable reason, Luke Matthew Short is hanging out there in early twenty twenty two. Why? Super cash? Just dealing with a few charges. Not surprising coming from the sky though. No. Not at all. You know, like two counts of assault. Criminal trespass, and inducing panic, which seems like it would be the weird one of the list of charges, but There's some other truly bizarre ones that I'm not super familiar with because if I'm being honest, I didn't even know they were on the books.

Now I have to take a deep breath here. Disorderly conduct unreasonable noise or fensive utterance gesture or display. That's a crime. Listen, which I will now be mailing out numerous citations I've personally issued for this very charge. Right. Seems like we're probably issuing a dangerously low number of these bad boys. So Just doing my civic duty.

Okay, Cassie, click your link. Okay. K. Don't look at it. You said click it. I know it. Click it. Click the link, but then just, like, close your eyes or something. K.

But you know what's fun about this case? What? Well, number one, without looking at the face of the man featured on this poster, Cassie, can you tell me what municipal court Luke was wanted by? Don't look yet. Where is it? It's just above my pinky. Oregon Municipal Court? Correct. K. Oregon. Yeah. Oregon. Hey, Cassie. Yes. Did you know that there's a lakefront suburban city in Ohio named of all things, Oregon? No. Sorry, guys. There's been some trickery of afoot. You But it's all in the spirit of some slightly impish, albeit relatively safe holiday fun. Cassie, can you please read the top line of this wanted poster that was posted by Ohio? Law enforcement to Facebook? Please take care to spell the final word there. Okay.

Help catch this leprechaun, l e p r e c o n, dad joke. Leprechaun. Get it. I get it. Get it, guys. You get it. Okay. Now maybe you can take a moment to describe the clip art featured. Okay. So there's a little leprecon dressed in a green and white striped outfit. Looks like a prison outfit with a little, you know, ball and chain type of deal. And then pot of gold? You have correctly identified the clip art. Nice.

Now, if you had to take a wild guess, how they came up with this idea? What do you think they drew their inspiration from instructions for you. Please describe the tattoo. On the leprechaun's face or what? Here's a face tattoo I haven't looked yet. Please describe the tattoo. For those of you listening, it'll be in the carousel of photos, but for everyone listening right now just in case they're driving or whatever the case may be.

Okay. So now I can look. You can look at his ridiculous face tattoos. Oh my god. He definitely has a shamrock. Is that a Shamrock or a four leaf clover? I don't know what it it's I it's got like a little tiny x her leaf, but it's not quite a four leaf clover filling. I was like, they got they got clever with it. That is Not a good tattoo. It's a really bad tattoo. They're they're on your cheek. He's got a clover. I mean, if you face tattoos, that's fine. Yeah. But don't be a criminal. Yeah. Or we're gonna make fun of them. Yeah. I mean, like, it's gotta be a really good tattoo and also don't be a criminal. Like, it's on your face, bro. It's literally on your face. Everyone sees it. So, yeah, the funny part is I actually thought that he had come to Oregon in the last, like, handful of years.

When I looked at the poster, it doesn't say Oregon, Ohio. Municipal court? No. It just says Oregon. And I'm like, I cannot find a single thing about these charges. In Oregon. What in the fuck? Also municipal court, that's a city thing. And then, what do you know? Oregon is a city in Ohio. That's interesting. Yeah. Oregon, Ohio. Oregon, Ohio. We gotta start new memes.

Y'all be wild in out there in Oregon. Oh. Oh. Get it? Oh. Oh. Oregon. You might have. You bamboozled us. I hope so. Just suckers. We fell for it. Well, I fell for it. I liked it. That was good. Oregon. Oregon. -- a leprechaun in Oregon. An Oregon. Did he come from Milson Park? Okay. That was last year's St. Patrick's Day episode. If you haven't listened to it yet, to go back a year. Wow. One whole year. One whole year. So, Taro? Should we do some Taro on this? Taro? I'm really excited.

So we're dressed up today for the Carol video for the Patreon. Yay. I'm wearing my only green shirt I had with me. It's Billy. She has a booger coming out of her nose. It's my necklace. I see what you did there. Are we gonna show off her socks? Yeah. Show the people. To go to go to go. Can you see it? I'm so cute. Okay.

We have a bunch of green crystals around, bunch of gold crystals, some real a real pot of gold that I gave to Caitlyn. Yeah. That's from last year's St. Potty's day. Yeah. This year? Oh, these festive mugs. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Says liquid gold. I guess I have to take a drink if I choose. They kinda look like little cauldrons or pots of gold.

I have two green mushrooms of varying sizes. A really big and a really small. Okay. I'm setting these up here. Do I wanna draw? I think. Okay. Oh, it's cute. What do we get? Day, la. Two of cards. Yes. Okay. I feel like I've gotten this card recently. I was putting together some little Terra goodies, and I was working in the cups last night. So It's picking up some cups energy from this gal. I like that. I know that's a good card. Ease it? I think it is. Yeah. This is interesting. Okay. Drew this upright, so maybe the only thing that it has We'll see. Okay. Two of cups.

Our keywords are partnership, harmony, creative exchange, and cooperation. In many decks, the two of cups shows a man and woman holding challices as if toasting each other. We we just did. No, we did. The card represents joining forces with someone either romantically or in a creative slash spiritual endeavor. Oh, You share a common dream, interest, or passion and can work together to bring it into being. Mutual respect and equality exist between you. The upright too indicates a period of harmony when things go smoothly between you and another person. I think of this as the honeymoon guide. When you have high hopes and experience a time of accord, optimism, inspiration, and goodwill.

I don't even know which way to read this. I feel like I so you didn't let me touch the deck at all. I wonder if that's the plan. Okay. I think it's saying, like, you too need to work together. Said, like, both of you need to touch the deck. I know he was trying to shuffle to to get things going and make sure we, like Yeah. It got the video. It didn't really realize until Yeah. I didn't either. Okay. So I think we need to draw another card. We know our powers work better together. I still think you need to draw, but I need to shuffle some of this.

St. Patrick's Dan or Dan's. Okay. I think this is gonna work better here. I got excited. Okay. The universe always got her back. I think I'm just gonna go with the top card. Okay. I'm gonna go crazy. Okay.

What is it? Oh, it's a nine. Okay. It's the nine of six. Nine of six. And it's gone. Oh. Oh. In reverse. I'm like, it's a six. I've been getting a lot of nines and sixes and threes recently. Yeah.

Is this a beaver? What is I mean Is this is this a Neutria? Oh, it might be. I like to try to guess first. Yeah. I don't. I'm like, just tell me what it is now. So is this wands then? Yeah. Oh, it's a North American porcupine. Oh, okay. I was gonna say that looks spiky. Yeah. Okay. Okay.

So nine of wands, our keywords are courage, recovery, strength, success, and conquest. The nine of one shows you defending your territory, You've demonstrated courage and tenacity improved yourself to be a powerful force. Now you're in a strong position where you command respect, support and rewards. This is also a card of recovery after a setback or illness. Okay. And we did get it in the reverse. So oh, Cassie. Yell's. There's an extra excerpt. Okay. I'm excited.

Tie knots. The last of the single digit numbers nine signifies fullness and power as the result of three times three, it holds magical symbolism in spell work. To encourage the speed and effectiveness of an amulet or talisman, you can tie nine knots to close it. Interesting. Which you're wearing in a unit. I wonder if that has nine knots on it. Yeah. I know I was literally just thinking that I'm not gonna count the knots in front of really. Alright. Fine.

When the nine of ones appears reversed, it advises you to cut your loss and get out of a situation that isn't going to improve. You may be fighting a losing battle and need to move on to something else. Use the lessons you've learned as you chart a new course. Yeah, dude. I forgot his name already, but Luke. Shawn Shawn Luke. Shawn Luke, in a reading about money, this card suggests an investment hasn't paid off. You need to stop throwing good money after bad. Oh, that's very interesting because that was kind of a big part of kind of his thing. Yeah. Perhaps you can benefit from establishing a budget or getting a handle on expenses. Yeah.

In a reading about work, the reverse nine can signify a job change or even a new career path. Not for this guy. I mean, maybe he's gonna stop being a career criminal. You've accomplished as much as you can in your current position. You did the most. Such a seek a new direction that will rekindle your passion. So maybe he'll become a tattoo artist. Maybe.

In a reading about love, this car can indicate the end of a relationship. Let's fucking hope so. I mean, the ones where he was abusing people. Mhmm. Perhaps an existing partnership has lost its glow or you've finished what you were meant to do together. Like, y'all made a baby. Let's let that be that.

I don't know. Let it go. Okay. Wait up. Oh, sorry to go. Oh, boy. I like to do the annoying version of that for the kids because it they were like, But I didn't do it for you guys because it's really bad. It's like a screech. Like, let it go, but like a screech at the end. Oh, boy. They love it. Well, we have to end this video. I can have her do that for me over since vintage too. And another glass of rose. Oh. Should I read this little fun funsy? I don't know if it relates, but let's do it. It's kind of long. I don't know. Do we wanna hear me read for this long? I do.

It says nine of wands, injury, and resilience, survival, perseverance fatigue, a last stand achieving victory at a cost. That's basically what you're said. Okay. Yeah. I wonder if this was his last crime. You know what I mean? Like, maybe for at least a couple minutes. It says, yes, it was dark, and yes. I was I was gonna say I was a porky fine. It says I was preoccupied. Yes. I was a porcupine. Gosh. He is a porcupine. And, yes, I was preoccupied. But still it seemed like the Bobcat dropped in out of nowhere.

One moment, I was forging for roots. Raping my teeth satisfyingly on their tough outer skin. Oh, dude. That's a metaphor for, you know, this tough outer skin. Tungsten looks the drugs. Oh, the drugs? Yeah. I was like, what's a drug?

The next I was swatted clear across the grove by a psaw the size of my head. Was it any beating women? Mhmm. Wow. Okay.

In a single leap, she was on me again. Jaws snapping, teeth trying to find purchase on my neck. Nearly succeeding before I could roll up and cover. I heard a yellp as her starling monstrous face met with my pills instead of soft flesh. Just perfect. Now she was angry. Oh god. This is, like, give me chilly willies. Oh my god. She came at me again as I made for the borough in a panic in a panicked waddle. A little four coupon one. There was no way I'd get there in time. Bobcats are lightning quick. There'd be no avoiding her attacks. No opportunity to dodge or react in the moment. I raised my quills as prepared as I could be, come what may. There's more of you guys.

Later, when the Bobcat was gone, when I had stopped trembling in the dark confines of the borough, When I had slept into my surprise, awoken, and surveyed my injuries, I had survived. I scraped by bloodied, but mostly whole. Oh my gosh. It like reminds me of the window breaking. I would heal, but I would always bear the marks. I would always feel the skin stretching awkwardly over the scar tissue when I moved in certain ways. That was really creepy. Wow. Okay. Geez.

We don't even normally read the animal to subscriptions. I mean, unless it seems interesting, but -- Yeah. -- I've been starting to just because it's like it's very creative. I think what they write. Yeah. So I wanna read it anyway, like, even if it's just for Patreon. But I think that totally related. That's crazy. Okay.

Well, that worked. Yeah. I mean, he's definitely a porcupine. Yeah. As a person. If Yes. Or is he the is it a coyote they were talking about? Bobcat. Bobcat? I yeah. I don't know. I think he's a porcupine. I don't know. Be a Bobcat? Yeah. Yeah. That's a good way to put a oh, boy. Wow. There's a green on the card, which is interesting. I thought we were gonna get something kind of green. The first one did. Yeah. I think the first one was us in the spirit of Saint Patty's Day, and the second one was like, alright. Here's this fuck. Yeah. Exactly. Have a creepy Yeah. Saint Patrick's Day. See you next Tuesday. Wait. Not not as creepy as Luke's. Or Sean's. I don't know. Whatever his name is. Who knows? Porcupine Bobcat.

So for all of you that are listening, if you have any true crime or paranormal stories that you want us to share, maybe with the whole Pacific Northwest? Yes. We would love to read them on the pod. Yes. We will read them out loud. Not just in our hubs. Yes. They don't have to be from the Pacific Northwest if you would like to share. Email us at p n w hunch and homocides at gmail dot com. It's all spelled out no special characters. Super duper easy peasy. Follow us on Instagram and Facebook. Same thing as the email at PNW, Hans and Homicides all spelled out no special characters. Please also rate and review us on whatever plot form you're listening to and check out our stories on social media because our main game is hot. Agreed. And if you agree like Caitlyn, you can also find us on Patreon and support the show.

Beijing, Lucas County? No. Just above my pinky down below Lucas. I don't think about. What am I? What? That one? That one. My fingers touching it. Where? Down here? No. No. No. My pinky. Your pinky? The name? Below it. No. No. No. The far yeah. Right there. Trust us and nope. Below that. In green. Oregon. Yeah. You you were covering it up. You're killing me. Oh, I can see it.